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The Nightmare -part 1- by Uberlisk | Sep 18th 2009, 19:09 | |
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Attention!! Attention!! Attention!! This is the third and final addition to my first and second book "The Sacrifice" and "The Domination" These are all very dependant and you must read them from the beginning. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Nightmare Part 1 ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- by Uberlisk ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Chapter 1: Fall of the Swarm. Travis Gregory Randall stood at the bottom of a very deep pit... within a massive space platform... infested by the Kaelroth Brood. The Legionnaires were dead. The Zealots were dead. Travis himself strained hard to remain focused. To remain conscious. This was not very easy, considering he was trapped at the bottom of this pit, underneath many tons of dying Zerg flesh. The Zerg had poured in here by the thousands; called by the irresistible charm of Randall's psychic broadcaster. The device was currently inside the bleeding chest of a dead Ultralord that lay on top of Travis' shoulders. After that, Travis was not sure what kinds of Zerg filled the pit with their murderous bodies. The insanity caused by the broadcaster had quieted as the device ran out of energy. Something else had changed as well. Travis could sense it through the still-pulsing minds all around him. The ordered hierarchy of the Swarm had been snuffed out; replaced by a sort of psionic static. Travis felt this static increase and he knew. He knew that James Raynor had completed his task. Sarah Kerrigan, the Queen of Blades... was dead. As he remained trapped in the pit, Zerg blood rose over his shoulders. Travis had no idea what he should do. He didn't even know whether to rejoice at the defeat of the organized Zerg, or shake in fear of the rise of an unchained Swarm. The only thing he knew for sure was that he would soon be drowning in a well of blood, and his cyborg body was running out of power. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Are you guys ready to enter the nightmare?  |
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| Sep 18th 2009, 19:16 | |
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First. More after I read.
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| Sep 18th 2009, 20:02 | |
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Firs- ****!
 This is gettin' exciting. I can't wait to hear the rest of this. It's got me all... apprehensive. I mean, trapped under tons of zerg flesh, with blood rising? Gruesome. Evil. Nightmarish. |
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| Sep 18th 2009, 20:15 | |
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Wow.. stuck under tons and tons of dead flesh. Glad he's still alive. Also glad Kerrigan is dead. You have set up the novel for an epic plot twist. Travis is going to do something crazy and there are no friends such as Ytarna to prevent him from doing such.
My predictions/fanfic: Travis is stuck at the bottom of hundreds of zerg for months. He starts to go insane. However, with his high intelligence he finds a way to save himself. He uses small robotic drones to hook up the thousands of zerg brains and organs to his own and uses nearby metal to form himself a body and more drones. Eventually he reaches a point where he is god like in thinking power and massive. He manages to escape. He fuses zerg and machine, using his boralium to improve himself. When he makes his grand appearance Duran has made thousands of zerg protoss hybrids and the entire xel'naga race has implanted their souls into those bodies. Travis's body is too physically weak so he creates a new race. A race made up of him. His thought processes have spread out through the new organism he became, smearing the boundaries of his brain. Travis uses this to his advantage, making every unit in his race make up his thought process. Every one of the new beings is part of his mind and each one is Randall. He become what the overmind could only dream of. Travis now was a collective consciousness of thoughts and every one of those thoughts were his thoughts. With 10,000 of the units Travis could live 10,000 years of experience is just one year. Boralium powered the instantaneous subspace comunication that border infinite in range. Sigh... I want to make a fanfic that branches off of yours, but I would be such a copy cat. If I did make something like this I would need to give the main character a personality and history; something to prove that the collective consciousness is human and have the virtues of a noble man. I have never been interested in writing; english is my most hated class. However, Uberlisk, you have inspired me to make a new fanfic. The small fanfic above is related to yours but I am going to make mine in a new setting/storyline. Totally new. Same principle storyline of a race that is really just one being etc etc. |
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| Sep 18th 2009, 21:34 | |
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@COV: Heh heh... Good to have you back.
@kraziliak: WoaH you started a really awesome plot there. I loved the idea of the Randalmind; a massive collective sentience. (With actual genius minds behind every single unit! Awesome!) Unfortunately, it is not at all what I have planned. As far as you disliking english, I must say that you have natural talent AND you should not base your entire understanding of fiction by whatever english class you take. After all, that class of yours may suck hot beans compared to other english classes that you may actually enjoy. DO NOT let a crappy english class keep you from writing. If you like stories at all, and you have some imagination, GO FOR IT!!! I will post more of the Nightmare tomorrow. (Sorry, but it's late...) |
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| Sep 18th 2009, 21:49 | |
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Dammnnnn youuuuu UBBEEEERRRR!!! First, you lead us blindly, like sheep, into a warm embrace of knowledge and tension, then you strike us down with a 12-16 hour wait!
Curse you, curse you to HELLL!!! Now, say this all with a proper russian accent, and you have the right effect. |
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| Sep 18th 2009, 22:03 | |
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Wow that was a epicly fast trilogy. Lot faster than silent_templars. Keep up the good work!
If your bored, read my Fanfictions! Click my sig to read.
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| Sep 19th 2009, 00:15 | |
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please write more uber!!! I am ready for more of the nightmare!!!
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| Sep 19th 2009, 02:24 | |
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darn it! waiting for the next chapter of teh Nightmare is a nightmare!
also it says in the first chapter Travis STOOD on the bottom of the pit. How can he do so if tons of dead zerg are on top of him?  |
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| Sep 19th 2009, 06:12 | |
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Lets sing the waiting song!
Waiting waiting were all waiting! Just waiting for an awesome story
Fear my member powers!
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| Sep 19th 2009, 06:36 | |
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its still a good story keep up the good work uber,
the stood part can be edited no ones perfect
yes yes say no more my lord, I shall make it so.
....never know what hit'em  |
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| Sep 19th 2009, 06:40 | |
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uber u know what your worst part is
you do a great cliff hanger and then u cut us off zergie is right waiting is a nightmare
"Nothing great was ever accomplished without much risk"
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| Sep 19th 2009, 08:32 | |
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A fanfic in an alternate version of SC universe... wow!
Now, with Kerrigan dead, Travis could turn into a Strogg Makron from Quake2 & 4. :-P    |
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| Sep 19th 2009, 10:38 | |
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i hope that randall dosen't become evil but stays good and like takes down the terran dominion
"Nothing great was ever accomplished without much risk"
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| Sep 19th 2009, 11:47 | |
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ok just read the domination WOW u let sarah die,
i bet travis will merge with the zerg to create the overmind mark 2 and then the overmind mark 2 will crash into an xelnaga ship and fuse with the that and then......something amazing will hapen like it will go and cestroy the terran domion and thats how the book ends pls pls pls pls pls right some more  |
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